You’ve already seen their incredible first kiss. Get ready to be wowed by their bad-ass tea party. Then warm up your voice for some drunken motown at their after-party. -Becca
The offbeat bride: Beca, reporter (and Tribe member)
Her offbeat partner: Martin, archeologist
Location & date of wedding: Historic brownstone B&B in Boston, MA — October 17, 2009
What made our wedding offbeat: I’m a Brazilian-American and former Catholic while Mart is an American-Swiss mish-mash. We met in Scotland. We had family and friends in Miami, San Francisco, Zurich, Edinburgh, Brasilia and Dubai. Anything we did was going to be weird to somebody, so we just did what felt right: we got married in the city we love and love in.
Four of my aunts had never seen snow until that weekend! We only had seventy-five guests for the fancy ‘do, which is unheard-of-small in my family (my mom had eight siblings and fifty first cousins: do the math).
The wedding was in two parts: the dress-up afternoon tea party where fancy hats were encouraged, and the late-night booze-up at our house. That way, we could invite everyone we wanted without breaking the bank and not worry about ruining our nice new clothes!
The afternoon gig was very simple but very fun with no booze (aside from the toast) and no music, but lots of good conversation and a polaroid guestbook station, compete with props.
The after-party at the house featured fifteen gallons of homebrew, another seven cases of Sam Adams (hey, we went all local, right?), and a case of Absolut Boston vodka. We partied from eight-ish until the subway started running again (5 am), and some people stayed even past that. Our lovely neighbors did not call the cops.
To “atone” for this complete ass-backwards affair, my Brazilian family insisted on throwing us the party they wish we’d had a few months later. Hey, we’ll take the excuse for going to Brazil when it’s handed to us. That way, they got to invite 200 relatives and play the loud music. It worked out for everyone!
We included readings from Kahlil Gibran‘s The Prophet, which my parents used at their wedding (and I didn’t know about until they told me after!), and one of Pablo Neruda‘s sonnets. I used Roy Croft for my vows, and Mart used Mark Twain for his.
My favorite moment: My favorite moment was walking in together, which I refused to compromise on, and I am so glad I stuck to my guns. Taking a moment during the ceremony to look at everyone who had come to support and love us was overwhelming in the best sense.
My funniest moment: Singing Motown tunes at the top of our lungs at about 3 AM. It’s not a party unless there’s drunken Motown.
Was there anything you were sure was going to be a total disaster that unexpectedly turned out great? Not really. I knew the people who mattered were going to be there, and that I’d be married at the end of the day. Everything else was sauce.
My advice for offbeat brides: Compromise without being compromising. Stick to what truly, truly matters, but be willing to work with parents, attendants, friends, whatever, on other stuff.
What was the most important lesson you learned from your wedding? Be compassionate. Remember that 99% of the time, people are trying to help you, even if it’s a way that totally baffles you. Try and figure out WHY they want what they want, and find a way to give them that feeling in a way YOU like, and you’ll both be happier.
Care to share a few vendor/shopping links?
- Venue: The College Club — Awesome venue, awesome rates, awesome food, and Jesse, the chef/coordinator, was excellent to work with. He’s swamped to hell, but he bent over twice to get us what we wanted for what we could afford.
- Seamstress: Storied Threads — our seamstress, who made my dress and bolero and Mart’s jacket for a criminally low amount.
- Photographer: Laura Ryan — our fabulous photog, who came in from NYC for us.
- Florist/tabletop artist: Petal and Leaf.
- Musicians: Atlantic Strings who learned music from Lord of the Rings for our processional.
- Jewelry: Spotted Octopus. She made my and BM’s earrings. She is all about the custom orders. <3!
- Cupcakes: Babycakes. Every flavor we tried at Babycakes was out of this world.
- Make-up: Claudia Moriel. No trial. We emailed ahead of time, I showed her pictures, and she NAILED what I wanted. She was great; very professional and very fun.
Enough talk — show me the wedding porn!