The Offbeat Bride: Erin, Admin Assistant
Her Offbeat Partner: Tim, Theater student
Location & Date of wedding: First UU Church, Indiana, PA — August 2nd 2008
What made our wedding offbeat: We built our ceremony from the ground up. Tim wrote our vows, we chose readings that reflected us and our families. Likewise we did everything we could to keep it low cost and free of the faux-formality of a lot of weddings today.
That being said, both Tim and I love to dress up so we just had to go all out, Tim and his groomsmen (and groomswoman) in top hats and tuxedos with canes, myself in the most ridiculously poofy dress I could find. It was spontaneous, carefree, playful and at every moment completely and totally us.
Our biggest challenge: Balancing my desire to have a very pagan hand fasting with the need to maintain a certain family friendly normalcy.
If our wedding had only been about Tim and I we would’ve been calling the corners and casting circles but as it was, we didn’t want to alienate our families on what was going to be one of the biggest days of our lives. So we toed the line, the reverend at the Indiana Unitarian Universalist church was spectacular, and even though we are not Unitarians ourselves, she was accommodating and helped us make the ceremony that fit us the best. And seeing the word “church” on the invitations set our extended families minds at ease.
Also by doing a number of traditional things — the bridesmaids matched, my Dad walked me down the aisle, I wore white, etc., it helped tone down our more offbeat aspects — we all wore converse, the entire bridal party had visible tattoos, the handfasting etc.
My favorite moment: Just after the ceremony as Tim and I jumped the broom then ran down the aisle. We were outside and it was the most spectacularly sunny, warm but not hot day. We were just laughing and bouncing all over the place, shouting “HOLY SHIT WE’RE MARRIED!” It was perfect.
My advice for other offbeat brides: Be flexible. It’s okay to do something because it works, even if it’s not exactly what you want. Don’t let yourself be bullied into changing things that are very important to you, but be aware of what you feel is necessary and what you can really life without. Ultimately most of the things (except the groom) at my wedding were all things that I compromised on, very little of my original vision went into the big day.
That said, it was completely perfect as it was, and I couldn’t imagine being as happy as I am with how my wedding turned out if it had been any other way.